As Rev. Nicole Bullock strapped her baby daughter to her chest in a Moby wrap and stepped up to the pulpit to preach, she realized something had to change. This moment of clarity came after years of pushing herself to the limit as a church planter, pastor, and new mother. It was a turning point that would reshape her approach to ministry and self-care.
In a recent episode of the Pivot Podcast, Nicole shared her journey and insights with hosts Rev. Dr. Dwight Zscheile and Dr. Alicia Granholm, offering valuable lessons for church leaders navigating the complexities of ministry in today’s world.
A Journey of Faith and Innovation
Nicole’s story begins in Chicago, where she felt called to pastoral ministry during college. Her path led her to Minnesota, where she planted Blue Oaks Church, a diverse congregation intentionally created to reflect “a picture here on earth of what the kingdom of heaven looks like.”
“We were purposely a church just not focused on urban missions, but also being a diverse congregation,” Nicole explains. “It was very important to us that we were a picture here on earth of what the kingdom of heaven looks like—people from every tribe, every race, every color.”
For 15 years, Nicole led Blue Oaks Church, navigating the challenges of being a woman of color in leadership and adapting to the seismic shifts brought by the COVID-19 pandemic. Her experiences have given her unique insights into the evolving landscape of church leadership and ministry.
Prioritize Self-Care and Boundaries
One of the most crucial lessons Nicole learned was the importance of self-care and setting boundaries. She advises leaders to start by setting boundaries with themselves before trying to set them with others.
“The first order of self-care is to find someone who can help you carry the load, even if that is a professional,” Nicole says. “Get a spiritual director, get a therapist. I think sometimes we as leaders, we’re so laser focused on the mission and the work that we forget that we can still be creative in tugging on other resources than the ones that are right in front of us.”
Reframe Expectations and Embrace Disappointment
Nicole emphasizes the need to reframe congregational expectations and be prepared for some disappointment when setting new boundaries. She suggests using these moments as teaching opportunities.
“One of the ways that you can care for people is by setting boundaries, and showing them what it looks like,” she says. “I don’t think people should be dismissed and disregarded just because they don’t understand the concept of your boundary. I think that’s an opportunity to teach.”
This process of reframing expectations is not just about saying “no” to requests or limiting availability. It’s about educating the congregation on the importance of sustainable ministry practices. Nicole suggests being transparent about the reasons behind new boundaries or changes in pastoral roles. For example, explain how proper rest and time for spiritual renewal ultimately benefit the entire church community by ensuring a healthier, more effective leader.
However, Nicole also acknowledges that this process isn’t always smooth. “Someone will be disappointed,” she warns. But disappointment is a natural part of change and shouldn’t be seen as a failure. Instead, it’s an opportunity for growth—both for the pastor and the congregation. By standing firm in healthy boundaries, while showing empathy for those struggling with the changes, pastors can model the very self-care and balance they’re advocating for.
Moreover, Nicole encourages leaders to view this reframing as a long-term investment in the health of the church. While initial reactions may include disappointment or resistance, over time, a congregation led by a well-balanced, burnout-resistant pastor is more likely to thrive. This approach also sets a positive example for other leaders and members in the church, potentially shifting the entire culture towards more sustainable practices.
Normalize Endings and Redefine Success
Reflecting on the life cycle of Blue Oaks Church, Nicole offers two important perspectives:
“Normalize endings. Endings are okay… endings happen in life. We all have a beginning, we all have an end, right?”
She also encourages leaders to redefine success: “Redefining success to mean faithfulness and not productiveness. And don’t get me wrong, I was very productive as a leader. And I thought in order to be more successful, I needed to be more productive. But really, I just needed to be faithful to the thing that God had called me to do.”
The story of Blue Oaks Church is a powerful illustration of these principles. Nicole founded the church with a vision for a diverse, urban ministry in the Twin Cities. For 15 years, Blue Oaks thrived, creating a vibrant community that reflected “a picture here on earth of what the kingdom of heaven looks like.”
However, like many churches, Blue Oaks faced significant challenges during the COVID-19 pandemic. Nicole shares, “We got, you know, as many churches did, a little disrupted. That’s an understatement. Through COVID, we did some things online and eventually fully transitioned [to an online community].”
Ultimately, Blue Oaks Church closed its doors. But rather than viewing this as a failure, Nicole sees it as a natural part of the church’s life cycle.
This willingness to adapt and change, even if it means ending one chapter to begin another, is a crucial skill for church leaders in today’s rapidly changing world.
Moreover, Nicole’s redefinition of success is particularly poignant in light of Blue Oaks’ story. Success wasn’t measured by the longevity of the church, or by continual growth in numbers. Instead, success was measured by faithfulness to the call—creating a diverse community, serving the urban area, and adapting to meet the needs of the congregation even when that meant significant changes until the church’s mission had been completed.
This perspective offers a powerful antidote to the burnout that often comes from chasing numerical growth or trying to maintain unsustainable ministry models. By focusing on faithfulness rather than traditional metrics of church success, leaders can find freedom and renewed purpose, even in the face of significant change or endings.
Embrace Innovative Approaches to Ministry
Nicole’s experience in planting and leading Blue Oaks Church, coupled with navigating the challenges of the COVID-19 pandemic, has uniquely positioned her to embrace and advocate for innovative approaches to ministry that address the root causes of pastoral burnout.
“I’ve now pivoted most of what I do to training, equipping church leaders and other nonprofit professionals and helping them navigate these waters,” Nicole explains. This shift allows her to multiply her impact, sharing the lessons she learned about sustainable ministry practices with a broader audience.
Nicole’s approach to innovation isn’t just about adopting new technologies or trendy ministry models. Instead, it’s rooted in a deep understanding of the changing landscape of church leadership and the need for sustainable, adaptable ministry practices that prevent burnout. She emphasizes the importance of being relationally oriented and intentional about building diverse, inclusive communities—lessons she learned and applied at Blue Oaks that helped create a more sustainable ministry environment.
Her current work includes founding two groundbreaking ministries: “She Preaches” and “Make Room.” Both initiatives are designed to empower women and people from all backgrounds to discover their purpose and take bold action in their lives. These ministries represent a direct application of the inclusive, empowering approach she cultivated at Blue Oaks, and they offer alternative models of ministry that distribute leadership and reduce the burden on any single individual.
Furthermore, Nicole offers coaching and consulting services, providing spiritual guidance and empowering kingdom leaders in various spheres. Her expertise extends to one-on-one mentoring, fostering diversity and inclusion, and nurturing the growth of women and mothers in leadership roles. Through these services, she directly addresses many of the isolation and overwhelm factors that contribute to pastoral burnout.
Leading Adaptive Change while Maintaining Well-Being
As church leaders continue to navigate the complexities of ministry in a rapidly changing world, Rev. Nicole Bullock’s insights offer a roadmap for not only surviving but thriving in ministry without succumbing to burnout. Her journey from youth pastor to church planter, and now to ministry innovator and mentor, provides a compelling case study in adapting to change while maintaining personal well-being.
The key lessons from Nicole’s experience—prioritizing self-care, setting healthy boundaries, reframing expectations, normalizing endings, redefining success, and embracing innovative approaches to ministry—all contribute to a holistic strategy for preventing pastoral burnout. By implementing these practices, leaders can create sustainable ministry models that allow them to serve their communities effectively for the long haul.
Moreover, Nicole’s current work in training and equipping church leaders represents a hopeful path forward. As more leaders adopt these burnout-resistant practices and innovative approaches, we may see a shift in church culture towards more sustainable, life-giving forms of ministry.
Ultimately, Nicole’s story reminds us that avoiding burnout isn’t just about working less or managing stress better—it’s about fundamentally reimagining what faithful, effective ministry looks like in the 21st century.
